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How You Create Your Own Suffering... and what you can do to shift.

Happy 2022 my friends! I'm not sure about you, but in the past, I would always get disappointed around the holidays.  

I have huge expectations and the season never ever lives up to them.  

This year, I took a whole new approach and just reminded myself when I was attaching to some sort of outcome I could never control and to just breathe and be in the moment.  

I really focused on accepting what was coming up and just living in that space.. in reality.  

Instead of focusing on what I wish was different, I just appreciated the unfolding.  

Truthfully, I found myself many times wishing myself out of the experience and wanting to change it... then I would remind myself that that's just a waste of energy and what was happening now is perfect and exactly the way it's meant to be.  

How do I know this?  

Because that's the reality of it.  

Isn't it amazing that we do this in so many aspects of our lives?  

Our experiences don't unfold the way we think it should, so we resist reality and then we create our own suffering.  

Yes, my friend, we are truly the creators of ALL of our suffering and it's simply because we resist what is.  

Are you resisting that truth?  

You might say well if my husband did this or that different, or my kids didn't fight, my relative was nicer, or blah blah blah then my experience would be better.  

Sure, it might be, but that's not what's happening so in your resistance to the truth of reality you are creating your very own suffering.  


Just think about ALL the mental energy we allow to be drained from our life force because we resist life.  

It's insanity. 

 Truly, it's insane because no matter how much we resist we will NEVER change the reality of what is.  

It just is.  

The sooner we can accept the actual reality that we must operate in, the sooner we can live with more compassion, love, and presence.  

AND we stop the drain of energy pouring out of our being.  

We will also stop the self-created suffering that plagues our lives.  

Can you imagine what life would be like if we could just flow with what is and live in complete acceptance of reality?  


My dear friend and mentor, Angela Ferrari, teaches a life-changing technique called "the cloak". 

I've been working with Angela for over 3 years and her teachings and the integration of those teachings have completely changed my life. 

So, I'm going to share a very simplified version of "the cloak" with you in hopes that it can help you as much as it's helped me.  

So when we find ourselves in resistance what are we supposed to do?  

Well, the first step is ALWAYS AWARENESS!!  

Become aware that you are resisting what is unfolding before you.  

Many of us just pass over the resistance because it's SO ingrained in our everyday lives.  

We just oppress it and push it down... we all know that this is completely unhealthy and keeps us stuck in life and in bad habits.  

Awareness is always the first step to changing anything we wish to change!  

The second step is to become conscious of where the energy that is resisting is existing in your body.  

You'll notice when you are in resistance that a part of your body will be activated by mental resistance.  

It will feel tight, uncomfortable, achy, or icky.  

I find most of the time the stuck energy is in my stomach, throat, or chest.  

The third step is to simply bring your awareness to this energy field.  

Bring your attention to this energy.  

I like to place my hands where ever it is pulsating in my body. 

The fourth step is to DROP the narrative.  

The mind will want to keep you from dealing with the energy and wants you stuck in the storyline.  

However, the story of why you are in resistance does not matter.  

It's irrelevant.  

The reason you think you are resisting is never the reason you are resisting.  

Just like the person who triggers you, isn't actually the cause of the trigger, just the gift to remind you of where you need healing.  

The fact is there is an old and outdated belief that is being triggered by something "outside" of you.  

It's not the something outside of you, but the energy within you that is causing your suffering.  

So the story holds NO value in this work.  

Just release it.  

The fifth step is to love that energy.  

Our attention is the ONLY thing we truly have.  

Think about it!  

Our attention is everything.  

Where our attention goes... grows.  

So bring your undivided attention to the energy, and bask that energy in love.  

Thank it. 
Love it. 
Honor it. 
Trust it.  

That energy field is only trying to show you one thing, that only love is real.  

Everything else is an illusion.  

If you are interested in learning more about this and many more techniques to transform your suffering, let me know.  

Angela is creating a new program to reach more people.  

I'm so honored to bring her work to more people.  

It has completely transformed my life and I wish this for every human on the planet, to be the creator of their heaven on earth. 


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