I saw this posted on Instagram.
It reminds me of years ago when I was in a race.
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A race to get healthier, happier, and more fulfilled.
I had no idea that I was racing against myself.
For so long I felt like I was just trying to keep up with the world.
My mind was flooded with to-dos and overwhelmed with self-criticism.
I could never live up to my own expectations.
I was hyper-focused on keeping up my image and social media and trying not to drown in my habitual and negative thinking.
I would rush through everything.
It was like I had very little time to do anything and everything.
I always felt overwhelmed and lived in my manic monkey mind.
Running myself ragged took its toll on my body, my relationships, and especially my relationship with myself.
My kids were suffering from all this rushing.
You can see this rushed energy everywhere.
The rush to school, work, grocery store, gym, yoga, and everywhere else we need to go.
The rush to accumulate and consume.
Our minds exist in the subconscious 90% of our days and we recycle up to 90% of our daily thoughts from the day before.
Where is the space we seek?
Where is that easeful and peaceful energy that we long for?
It's nowhere because it's inside of us.
I was making dinner AGAIN the other night.
I just felt annoyed to be in the kitchen.
All I wanted to do was lay in bed and read a book.
It was a long day and we were preparing to leave town the next day.
I had spent the majority of the day packing, doing laundry, cleaning, and getting organized to leave the kids for two nights as Scott and I headed to Scottsdale to see a beautiful and amazing friend perform.
I could feel my heart beating faster and there was tension in my stomach and throat.
It was as if I had a tight ball of energy just radiating in my torso.
Whenever we are stressed, the body feels it.
I've been practicing deep awareness through meditation and other practices to help me become more aware of my body at the moment because the body is a portal to truth and the present moment we seek.
I felt uncomfortable and agitated.
Have you ever felt this way and weren't quite sure why?
It happens to me all the time.
Soon, I brought my awareness to my body and took some deep breaths.
I became curious about the cause of this tension.
I asked myself, "why am I creating this stress and tension in my body"
Then as quickly as the question came in, the answer came up.
I was creating these feelings because I was rushing through dinner yet again.
I wanted it to be over, in fact, I didn't even want to make dinner.
Yet the fact was, dinner must be made and I was the one who was there to make it.
I closed my eyes and put one hand on my heart and the other on my belly.
Slowly I began to breathe into these spaces.
I focused my attention on these spaces and held my attention there for as long as I could.
I took deep breaths and could feel my chest began to feel lighter and my stomach untied its knots.
Then I felt an overall sense of calm and came into the present moment.
I realized that in my rushing and not being present was the source of my stress, not making dinner.
I can make dinner.
I can do all the things.
It's when I choose to make dinner and all the things in a rushed and unaware state, then I suffer.
No matter what's happening in life, it's the lens that we look through that determines our experience of what we see.
The lens we look through is our choice and we make each choice with consciousness or a lack of it.
My point is, that we are all in some sort of race.
If we aren't conscious of it, we will spend our whole lives trying to get somewhere that we don't even want to go.
We can feel the pressure from outside of us, our family, friends, culture, society, the world... and it can wear us down.
Yet, the most important thing to note is this, you don't have to abide by anything outside of you.
YOU are the creator of your world and if you prefer a slower and more intentional pace, it's at your fingertips, or rather it's just a way of being that you have access to right now.
The only person you are in competition with is the version of you yesterday.
There is no race.
So slow down.
Drive in your own lane and move from a place of awareness.
I made dinner and you know what it wasn't that bad.
I chose to make the best of it by playing some soft jazz, having my favorite Turmeric Kombucha, and putting love into the food I was serving my family.
The heaven we seek is right there in front of us, and it takes willpower and intention to draw it in.
So notice today, where are you rushing in your life?
Where do you feel overwhelmed?
How can you bring a sense of calm into what you are doing?
It's not hard... what can be the hardest part is just noticing and building awareness so that we can get out of the subconscious conditioned mind and step into the magic of the present moment.
Let's do that together, okay?
In love, light, and honor,
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