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The Story of My Awakening (Part 3) - You Should Stop Breastfeeding

awakening story Nov 22, 2021
Hey there :) 
I gave birth to my son in September 2011. 
I ended up having a C-section as he was breached and it was a traumatic birthing experience (more on that another time).
He was not a happy baby. He was a miserable baby.
He was constantly crying, gagging, spitting up, and seemed to always be in pain.
It was hell as a brand new mom. 
This experience did not mirror the hypothetical early motherhood experience I dreamed up before he was born.
I went to the pediatrician to tell him all about the excruciating pain my son was having.
He examined him and said, “Well I don’t see anything wrong, it could just be acid reflux and I think he could be allergic to something in your milk.”
Then he continued to suggest that I stop breastfeeding and find a formula to try.
He wrote me a prescription for some acid reflux medicine and walked out of the room. That was the last time I ever saw him.
I was SO confused.
“Allergic to my breastmilk?” I thought.
My stomach sank and felt a tidal wave of nausea.
I’m broken. I can’t even feed my baby. This was devastating.
I left feeling disempowered and confused.
He is the pediatrician… he knows best, right? 
This feels eerily familiar.
He had spent a total of maybe 7 full minutes with us. Just like all my other doctor and pediatrician visits before. 
It felt like I was on a conveyor belt.
My mom and I went to the store and bought 3 different types of formula.
My baby wouldn’t take to the bottle. 
All he wanted was my boob and to be bounced. This was the ONLY thing that soothed him.
I couldn’t take it anymore.
I would get to the bottom of this. Something in me decided to try and find the answers myself.
The answers I was given just felt SO wrong!
Stop breastfeeding. 
Give baby formula and acid reflux medication.
Nope. Not right.
I dove into Google and started hours and hours of research.
Looking for the potentially most simple and sensible thing to do.
There were articles talking about how babies just have acid reflux and you can get XYZ medication and some are just colicky, it’ll pass.
Then on something like the 10th page of the google search, I stumbled upon an article talking about how the mother’s diet has a huge impact on her baby. 
In fact, it said that some things she ate could cause digestive issues in her baby.
I was so unaware of this connection between what I was eating and the impact it had on my son.
Then I saw within that article how there are foods that can irritate the baby when the mom consumed them, like dairy, eggs, soy, gluten, and other highly allergic foods that can be causing my baby’s incessant pain.
I started to reflect and I had been downing pizza, breakfast burritos, Pita Jungle (my AZ peeps get this), and a nightly big bowl of ice cream.
Wow, I was the one causing his pain. A wave of guilt spread through me like wildfire.
I felt awful but I was going to do whatever it took to help my baby and keep him from feeling this horrible pain!
I started to clean up my diet. I removed all dairy, eggs, soy, gluten, and sugar. It was the hardest thing I had ever done.
The first few days were excruciating.
I was used to numbing my suffering with ice cream and bread.
Now I had nothing… no alcohol either since I was breastfeeding.
I was miserable, but in just 2 days my baby was a whole new baby.
He was happier and no longer screaming in pain 24/7.
I was amazed.
The food I was eating was causing all of this?
Why didn’t my pediatrician think to share this with me… did he not know?
I still am so surprised by this experience.
I was stuck in the sick-care trap and looking for answers from authoritative figures that I blindly trusted.
I truly believe these doctors mean no harm… they just don’t know.
They are ignorant and have been indoctrinated into a sick-care system that benefits from keeping us sick and addicted to pills.
They are trained to diagnose and prescribe. 
My biggest takeaway from this experience was that so many of us always look outside of ourselves for answers.
We look to the authorities. Those that we believe are smarter than we know our health better than we do.
But, do they?
This was the first moment I had ever begun to courageously challenge the advice of my doctors. I started to see through the veil.
I began to seek my own answers.
In the next part of this series, I'll share a day I’ll never forget.
It was another experience that pulled me further out of the matrix and it changed my life forever.
In love, Becky 

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